Enough of medical and psychiatric bills
We're not making love, we're staging military drills
I'm tired and I'm wondering how I ever got involved with you

I haven't figured in, but I can see
You're the worst thing that's ever happened to me
I'm fed up and I'm worried that I might be stuck with you

But when love rears its ugly head
There's no romance or roses
All we get instead are black eyes
And broken noses

I've never felt so bad about the way I feel
I'm often forced to reconsider your appeal
What it was I saw in you I've forgotten.
Did you once have money?

They say you only love the ones you hate
[No it's the other way around]
Well I can't think straight
Where did you put the aspirin, you're giving me another headache

But when love rears its ugly head
There's no romance or roses
All we get instead are black eyes
And broken noses

In the middle of the night
In the middle of a peaceful dream we rise
We lie there and wonder how others manage to be civilized
Is it that I just can't see because I simply do not know
While others are exchanging vows
We are exchanging blows

One of these days I'm gonna find a girl who'll
Treat me with respect, treat me like I want her to
Maybe even fix me dinner or at least not throw it at me

Yeah, one of these days I'm gonna find me a man
Who's got a real job, maybe understands
There's more to life than TV and watching his gut grow big

But when love rears its ugly head
There's no romance or roses
All we get instead are black eyes...
But when love rears its ugly head
There's no romance or roses
All we get instead are black eyes
And broken noses